Monday, September 10, 2012

New York Police Cater to "They Tried to Kill Us; We Survived; Let's Eat"

In case you haven't heard it before, the quip quoted above supposedly encapsulates most Jewish holidays; there's even a Facebook page devoted to it. Without perhaps meaning to, the New York Police Department fell in line with that light-hearted way of looking at what amounts to a pretty wretched history of hatred. At this year's intelligence briefing to local Jewish mucky-mucks re the threats Jewry faces during the upcoming High Holiday season, the NYPD had some bad news--Hezbo's out there and itching to kill 'em--and some good news--
there has been no specific threat against Israeli or other Jewish targets in the New York metropolitan area as the High Holy Days approach. And while Iran and Hezbollah have plotted strikes in several countries with growing frequency, most have failed or been foiled, causing relatively few deaths or injuries.
Quel relief, eh? Whereupon--cue the stereotypical tunes, and let's eat!
Regulars at the NYPD’s intelligence briefings, usually conducted in connection with its “Shield” program to educate the private-security community and other New Yorkers about terrorist threats, grasped that this meeting was different from all others. For one thing, attendees were welcomed by popular Yiddish folk tunes piped into the auditorium—“Fiddler on the Roof lite,” as one rabbi called the Muzak. Rabbi Dr. Alvin Kass, the NYPD’s chief chaplain, opened the event quoting the hero of Fiddler on the Roof, Broadway’s favorite Jewish musical: “One day it’s honey and raisin cake; the next day it’s a stomach ache.”

This being a Jewish holiday event, there was plenty of food. The Kosher Bagel Hole in Brooklyn supplied several varieties; a certification posted on the wall near the buffet attested to their kosher bona fides. Kosher as well were the accompanying spreads—plain cream cheese, salmon, and tuna. The alternative fare—muffins, rugalah, and, of course, cheese danish, quickly disappeared. Less popular were the vegetable and fruit platters. But almost every speaker, from Lieutenant Tony Giorgio, who opened the meeting, to Kelly himself, reminded guests that the “refreshments” would remain available before, during, and after the briefing.
What, no schmaltz herring? Kudos to the cops, though, for knowing their (hungry) audience (and may God bless and keep Hezbo and other crazed Jew-haters--far away from us and all infidels).

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